Thailand forum

@Neo

What's TIT? Are you calling me one?

14. Ok, ok, jeez.

15. That's true.

16. My last ones ripped apart when I was completely sober. They ripped apart when I slipped on some slimey rocks on Kata. I told the next vendor I bought them from about it and he said to bring them back if it happened with his ones. I think he may forget about our deal somehow if I actually call him on it. 200 ouch? Too much?

17. Thought so.

18. I'm close to bald - got about a number 3 shave. So far so good.

"11. An expat today told me that if the T-police look closely enough at your license and discover it's just for driving a car, and you're on a bike, they can and will fine you. Really?"

It's never happened to me and I drove on an illegal license for two years. On top of that, I used my car license at the motorvehicle department to get my motorcycle license - no problem.

"12. What's with all the tatts?"

Some people can't resist. Or they get drunk and stupid.

"13. I like it here and I want to stay, but I need cash to fuel my exploits. How does everyone here make a living? As in those here on the forums and also in Thailand, or those in that situation previously."

Take a job with a support firm in Iraq or Afghanistan, save a ton of money over a couple of year period, come out here and be a bum.

"14. How far does Les Majeste go? Can you get away with making fun of ladyboys in Youtube videos or will you feel the wrath for that too?"

Making fun of Katoey's on youtube should not be a problem.

"15. How do you deal with the grinding poverty, squalor and all the injured/malnourished people and animals wandering around?"

Exlpoit their poverty for your own benefit - such as sex with very good looking women for a very low cost.

"16. What's the average lifespan of a 200 baht pair of sunnies/thongs?"

I wouldn't know. I hate open toed footwear.

"17. I saw some boom buoys using the fat jiggling machines at the gym - do those things work?"

Marginally. Getting your heart rate up, working your ass off, works much better.

"18. Does it really matter which gas I fill my rented bike with? 91/95/Gasahol etc.."

Stick with 91 and you'll be happy.

"19. Anyone ever get headlice or worse from using the helmets from those rental places? "

Never happened to me - because I don't use them or rentals. Buy a chopper or a real bike. Not some crappy 100 CC thing. Any self-respecting man should be embarrased to be caught on some little scooter made for a woman.

"20. How are the rental prices for guest houses outside of Phuket - is 400/500 a night for a fully furnished room with balcony, bath, air con and wi-fi, that's 5 mins from the beach as good of a deal as I think it it?"

Sounds like a very good deal to me indeed.

"21. The Patong beach water is kinda brown-looking - is it considerably dirtier than that of Kata and Karon or am I just imagining things?"

I don't go to the beach, so I would not know.

"PS How long can you live here with the $ you saved working in Iraq etc for 2 years"

The rest of my life. I retired from the US Army so I get a check every month.

"15. I haven't been here long enough for my Western sense of morality to completely erode away and, err, I no pay for boom boom. Beyond me why you'd pay for it when so many of the local girls hit on you constantl"

No money, no honey. You can't ever really get it for free. There is always some monetary expecatation - it just might not appear so right away. I even have to pay my wife!

One more thing on the flip flops. When the vendor said to bring them back. It translates to come back and I will sell you another pair for 200 baht.

"Yeah, yeah no money no honey - I think the bar girls are programmed tothink that way, but there's plenty of regular ladies around working inrestaurants, cafes, hotels, banks etc whose blood is as red as ours.Honey was meant to be enjoyed by everybody. That's my humble perspective anyway"

No way. I don't care if the woman is Thiai, American, German... whatever. One way or another, you're going to pay. There are exceptions, but that's what they are, exceptions.

Sorry, not sure how to copy and paste from an earlier post.

@Nokka - I agree about the scooters being the real magnets. Whenever I hear the roar of some chopper, it's usually just some weather-beaten lesbian rolling by or a pot bellied old man.

Plus you probably get killed at the gas station when hooning around on those things - look pretty bloody cool though, gotta admit.